May 7, 2007
The Bitterfly Effect...
Bitterfly...an intentional play on words.
Christainity creates paradox: the Father, Son, and Spirit are one in the same but each individually unique; life is received ONLY in death; to receive on must give; to be made new on must be transformed, to be strong one must be nonviolent.
The paradox supplanted in my life lately is the anticipation of transformation. This summer, I am entering into a time of my life I am so very excited about, the very thought of this summer makes me a little nervous because I get so excited. Exciting/transforming for me= the college ministry at FBCgT, missional formation with my classmates, monastery prayer, and missional life together.
Why then are these opportunities a paradox? A butterfly becomes beautifully transformed by a grotesque, scary, and hard process. To be transformed is bittersweet. Absolutely sweet, but bitter nevertheless.
So, I face this summer and the rest of my life with the intentionality of continually being converted and transformed, knowing that this process will not be glamorous, easy, or fun. There will be good times, probably mostly good times. But good times are not the times that make things new. Thus, I anticipate and look forward to the transforming times when I will be revealed as a sinner in need of a mediator, priest, and King.
Bitterfly= the transformational process catalyzed by the grotesque, and it is to this that I wait.